The First 4 Steps To Cope With Your Parents Alzheimer’s diagnosis

We all have known someone at some time that was dealing with a loved one with Alzheimer’s but when this disease hits a little closer to home what do you do?  What steps should you take and where can you turn for answers or help?  Here are the first 4 steps to take after learning you will be caring for a loved one with Alzheimer’s. 

Step 1: Get Educated.  If you were in the room when the diagnosis was given you were no doubt given a stack of pamphlets and papers to read.  In the blur of the ride home and your mind swirling with what do I do next they probably got left in a stack somewhere.  READ THEM. Read those pamphlets, read those papers, and read anything else you can get your hands on about what this disease is and what you can expect.  Read how to help your parent understand what is going on, and what are the best choices for their care moving forward.  Step 1 is to educate yourself to all that you can. 

Step 2: Find Support.  If you have siblings or other close family that will be helping to care for your parent, contact them right away.  Also look for groups of other people who are going through the same thing.  Search for groups in your area or support groups online.  Having a group of people who are currently experiencing what you are going through can be very beneficial on those days where you are just not sure how you will go on.  Also many of the people in these groups have been through exactly what you are.  Your best friend or coworker maybe a great emotional support for you but the members of these groups can give you first hand advice and tips. 

Step 3: Make A Plan.  Write down the resources that you have available to you.  That will include financial resources as well as others who will be giving their time.  Next take the information that you gathered in step 1 and the people and information in step 2 and make a plan that will work best for all parties involved.  Will your loved one be moving in with you, staying in their home, or going to a facility?  Who will be responsible for what tasks and what can you do to keep from feeling burnt out?

Step 4: Get help.  While making your plan in step 3 you most likely came across a few holes that you didn’t readily have resources to fill.  Part of the learning process in caring for a loved one with Alzheimer’s will be learning what tasks YOU need to take care of and what tasks can be left to someone else or outsourced.   Obviously it would be more important for you to manage medication schedules and outsource cutting the grass to a neighborhood boy.  There are also resources available to help with many of the tasks people usually feel they need to take care of but can actually be done more efficiently if outsourced.  A few examples would be cutting the grass, light housekeeping, having dinners premade, and paying monthly bills for you and your parent or loved one.

I hope that this list gives you a place to start and a few steps of action items to help you get through the initial shock that an Alzheimer’s diagnosis can bring.  Please feel free to post your comments or questions and we would love to hear from you!